Wednesday Night
"God please don't let my birthday come tomorrow! I'm so miserable here and i don't want to spend my birthday this way. Its not fair that all the people that are suppose to be supporting me are just as far away as you are! I feel so alone. It's not fair that You aren't here with me right now; God, You should be here telling me i'm going to be ok, that i'm not going to be this crazy forever, that i'm not really crazy at all! I just want to go home I'm so tired!"

Thursday Morning
"Ok, God, I'll try today to not let anyone know how miserable I really am. I'll just put on a smile. Please, just let me make it through this day alive."

As soon as I finished that prayer my roommate Emily asked me if I wanted Pancakes or eggs for breakfast (as a SM you can only have one lol). I didn't go to worship that morning because I needed more time to convence myself that I could make it through the day. All of my morning classes went pretty well nothing unusual happened. At lunch I called my grandma! It was so great to talk to her because I was really missing my family and she made me laugh by talking about the good ol days lol. I had no idea that this would be the turning point of my day. (Bell rings) " ok, Grandma I have to go teach"  As I walked into my class room I noticed that all my students where there already. My first thought: "Am I late?" I asked them all to go ahead and take their seats so we could get started. They all looked at each other and then some one counted to 3. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU. HAPPY BIRTHDAY MISS JACKSON..... this is when one of the student pulled a homemade angel-shaped chocolate cake  from her desk and another student brought out a Gallon of ice cream....HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!!!!!   I was speechless. I almost cried.The rest of the period was spent with us eating and all of them taking turns to sing to me. One boy even made me a rap! When the dismissal bell rang the next class rushed in with another cake and hugs and smiles. After school some girls cleaned my classroom AND MY APARTMENT! I couldn't stop smiling it was just too much. I went for a run and watched the sunset( while doing some crunches on a hill lol) When I returned to my apartment my other roommate Christina told me that there was going to be a suprise party for me in just a few minutes so i needed to shower fast lol. She couldn't keep it to herself any longer. There were waffles, more ice cream, laughs, stories, birthday wishes, and even a long awaited chick flick. Once again, I almost cried.
Thursday Night
"O Father, my heart is overflowed with love. Undeserved love. I didn't expect anything for my birthday. To be honest I didn't have enough faith to expect anything, and yet You gave me so much. Thank You for leaving no room for me to doubt Your love or presence here with me."